Xander Harris – Urban Gothic 6.1

               First things first, I think the name is excellent. Anyone who uses a “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” character as a band name at least has a good sense of humor. It makes sense too once you consider the dark kind of music contained on “Urban Gothic”. Not Not Fun Records released this album, and it makes sense considering the heavy synth nature of the album.

                Urban Gothic is dark, but in a tongue-in-cheek kind of way. The way a lot of horror movies include humor at strange moments to lighten the mood. Xander Harris has the good fortunate of opening for some particular favorites of mine, Shit and Shine being one, Expo 70 being another. But while those bands are pretty readily established, Xander appears to be a work in process.

                Some of the songs on here are fairly decent but nothing really comes out at me. Longer tracks such as “Tanned Skin Dress” and “The House” fare well. The shorter tracks come across less distinctly. Most of the album tries for an electro-industrial vibe, and some of the songs do meet that requirement. Electro-industrial can be somewhat tricky, as the wrong mix can result in it sounding a bit cheesy. Unfortunately a few of the songs fall victim to sounding not kitsch, but just plain generic. 

                There is enough here to give me hope about future Xander Harris outings. For every song that doesn’t exactly meet its mark “When the Hammer starts to Swing” there is one that does “End Credits”. It is a bit of a mixed bag of quality, but next time around Xander will have a better feel for what works and what doesn’t.

Shit and Shine – Bass Puppy 7.7

Dubstep worries me. Every time I see it describe a band, I cringe a little inside. I don’t know why I do this, maybe I’m not English enough? Maybe I’m not tough enough? Honestly, when people ask me what my literal beef is with dubstep, I have a difficult time explaining. So when I saw Shit and Shine’s new offering was going to be dubstep based, I had two thoughts:

1.       Perhaps these guys can enlighten my mind.

2.       Perhaps I’m going to start disliking Shit and Shine.

Thankfully, it was the former rather than the latter. For one, they haven’t given up any of their trademark aggression and noise.  If you ever needed music to listen to while you acted in the most depraved manner possible, you could do worse than Shit and Shine. Shit and Shine are gross, disgusting, utterly foul people with the most twisted sense of humor I’ve seen since Lou Reed sang about how you shouldn’t shoot someone in the head since you’d stain the carpet.

“Bass Puppy” comes up first. Named after one of the sample players in the band, it is the more chaotic of the two tracks. Multiple grooves are born and destroyed through the course of the song. Random distorted vocals blast through the colossal noise. Lumbering along, it eventually transforms into a high-pitched locked groove towards the end.

Alternatively, “Fuck You Folk Singers” remains the calmer track. It displays Shit and Shine’s talent of letting something go on for an undefined period of time. Things such as subtly are put into use as the track threatens to burst out into full blown assault. By hinting at this rather than actually delivering it, it ends up being quite fantastic. Also, they apparently know their audience through those Pussy Galore samples “I hate your fucking guts” for their remarkably bizarre album “Exile on Main Street”.

Overall, I feel like Shit and Shine helped me through this often disappointing genre.

Strangulated Beatoffs – Beating Off All Over the World 7.3

When dealing with a band like this, it should usually come with a caveat. Mine would be this (via lastsigh.com): Here are a pair of musicians, who have made a career out of living at home with their mothers, smoking pot, and playing hockey, while getting together at odd intervals to play around with samples and percussion loops. Literally, that summarizes the entire band’s mission. And if that doesn’t sound appealing, tough. They aren't here to entertain you, or do anything productive and the world is better for it. Look them up on Google and you'll realize they thrive in the online blogspot environment. Honestly, they are just too weird to ignore. 

            Coming out of Drunks with Guns and White Suburban Youth, they decided to work with the weirdest loops they could find. Then, they decided to give virtually zero concerts (the only one in 10 years entertained the audience with a video of a dancing monkey for two thirds of the show) and still have 7s that are high in demand by collectors. Plus, there is the music, filled with epic guitar solos and technical prowess. Just kidding, it is just a bunch of slackers playing with loops. 

            Exploring the Zen of endless loops of stupid samples might seem lame to many, but the Beatoffs (Stan Seitrich and Fritz Noble) have a certain fucked-up charm to their inane ramblings. Perhaps the song “What Who Me” shows off the heights they can reach. Using a guitar and bizarre whistling, it actually forms a full-fledged song (by this album’s standards). “Babysitting” is as creepy as it sounds, with bizarre laughing mixed with ambient noise. In case you weren’t sure whether or not they were sarcastic, “Bury Back” should confirm it. With possibly the lamest drum sample known to man, they then play backwards muttering to a cheesy house melody. “Oh, My Favorite” is probably the only song on Earth with that sample, like ever.

            Saint Louis hasn’t done anything for America lately, but this band more than makes up for that fact. Oddly, these guys have actually influenced people, and not in just that “stare blankly at your TV” kind of way. A band you might have heard of, Shit and Shine covers their song “Practicing to be a Doctor” on their “Jealous of Shit and Shine” album.

            Thank your lucky stars that record companies actually bothered putting this stuff out. Skin Graft, you’re in my heart forever for whatever this is.