How Glenn Beck’s show REALLY ended

               When the Doors sang about “the ghosts crowd the child’s fragile eggshell mind” in the song “Peace Frog” they might have been singing about Glenn Beck. Some people just happen to have a lot of ghosts whispering crazy things into their ears. For a while now people have been heaping scorn on him just for being himself on TV. People have to be true to themselves both on and off of TV. That’s why he carries a chalkboard and a 5^th grade history textbook wherever he goes. 

                After the latest announcement, it seems he will be true to himself off of TV. Fox News is letting him go. No doubt this will make him even more unstable; something which is going to take a great deal of work on his part. I mean, the guy really is the poster child of crazy by this point. How could he go crazier? Is it even possible?

                Here at Beach Sloth, we’ve tried to help Glenn Beck. We made a MIX CD for him, to help calm his nerves after anything happens to him. I’m sure all those drugs he took for a decade and a half didn’t help his mind. Though many would say he brought this on himself due to his barely coherent ravings and crying, I’m not so sure there isn’t a conspiracy afoot, one bigger than all of us where George Soros is involved in some way. 

                On Glenn’s show, he often discusses conspiracies. While many call these insane, how do you explain Glenn’s dismissal right as he was explaining the new world order? It seems pretty suspicious he’d be let go after he talked about the Marxist-Islamist cabal operating out of Babylon for the coming of the caliphate. Yes, he knew it all. Progressives were out to destroy America. Economics no longer made sense, as agribusiness was in bed with Dutch Royalty to ensure grain prices would be fixed. Finally, global warming was a joke created by a former KGB agent who went by the name of ‘Sparky’ who just happens to work installing energy-efficient light-bulbs in the Boston suburbs. How convenient. I’d like to explore this further, but the conspiracy is so vast and all-knowing that it isn’t safe. For they kicked Glenn off of his show, who knows what they could do to my blog, perhaps troll it? Perish the thought. 

                Glenn went too far. By revealing this intricate and improbable web of deception, he had taken the red pill. Going down that rabbit hole has its problems as he discovered. Like Neo he was taken to be a fool. But what kind of fool was given a prime slot on Fox News and advertised gold? Well, I’d say a genius kind of fool if you ask me.

                Now the progressives who are destroying America are broadcasting this from the liberal media, which in Glenn’s opinion is everyone. Even Glenn gets a little progressive now and then, quoting Kermit, a well-known member of Germany’s Green party. Kermit describes his involvement in Germany’s Green Party by stating how “It’s not easy being Green. Destroy Capitalism.” But I digress. 

                MSNBC announced the news of Glenn’s departure as they hid their erections behind the news desk, much like a teenager hides theirs behind a Math Textbook. CNN asked viewers to tweet their responses and proceeded to read the tweets as they were happening live for an hour, in order to give the illusion news was happening. On Charlie Rose, Glenn got interviewed in soothing tones surrounded by pitch black. In this environment, Glenn feels the most comfortable when there aren’t any distractions, otherwise his ADD starts acting up. 

                By letting him go, they’re letting the genie out of the bottle. Now he has no restraints in what he says. Can he out-crazy Charlie Sheen? Should he? What I think he should do is end his show on a positive note. Ending his show with a certain degree of levity will help people cope with his loss. Might I suggest Glenn singing with Mike Huckabee’s band the hit Billy Joel song “You may be right”

                You may be right

                I might be crazy

                But it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for.

                Glennspeed You! Beck Emperor.

MDMA Films: Bebe Zeva Preview 2

               Usually a movie doesn’t get a second trailer. The first one ought to be enough. MDMA Films is no ordinary company. How many film companies decide an entire movie will feature the actors doing drugs the entire time, real drugs, not faking some response. I’ll tell you: precious few. Actors wait until after the filming has ended before acting in such a manner. Just ask Charlie Sheen, ask him how hot that’s working out for him.

                Bebe Zeva comes out March 20^th, 2011. Tao and Megan Lin tend to every one of Bebe’s needs, and not needs. Feeding her ice cream, using positive re-enforcement when she does a good job, it seems they are getting in touch with their kind selves. Playlists apparently seem to be a specialty of hers, a gift not all people are granted. I’m glad they came out with this second trailer, which upon first viewing seems pointless (names of people are tightly edited together) but actually makes quite a bit of sense.

                Names pass by, whirling in your mind. References are edited to become only references, perhaps a nod to our culture of constant referencing of other pieces of information. Sure, this did exist before the internet, like political satire, but I feel a lot of information has become ‘ghetto-ized’ meaning people can better and more effectively live inside their own interests with no interaction whatsoever of anything else. For examples, just see how writers cater to a particular crowd, TV caters to a crowd, and music you can hide yourself away in forever. Though I am partial to Tao Lin's work, so I guess I do this to some degree.

Writers are mentioned besides Tao, Travis McFarland in particular. Carles of Hipster Runoff is mentioned multiple times. Whether or not this is deliberate or a conscious decision on her part is unclear. Editing it in that way shows how she originally started her online career at his infinitely ironic website. 

                Honestly, I get the impression Bebe would’ve been internet famous no matter who she met first, whether it was Carles or some other, possibly nicer blogger. Tao appear to be a far kinder person towards her than Hipster Runoff’s master ever was. Even though Carles is funny and provides occasional insight, keep in mind writers aren’t all kind. William S. Burroughs shot his wife in the head and neglected his son. Despite his failings, he managed to produce some fantastic work. Clearly Carles isn’t this bad, but his treatment of those he features on his blog show a certain callous mean streak. He wants you to ‘get vulnerable’ with him since that’s the easiest way he can break you down. Tao, on the other hand, is the natural friend of Bebe helping her along by doing legitimate work on her documentary. Critics of Tao’s books state his writing allows for a reader’s interpretation, it doesn’t enforce a particular emotion or way it wants you to feel. MDMA Films works in this interpretative vein. 

                All of MDMA Film’s other films lack multiple trailers. Watching this kind of trailer, with all its references, shows off exactly a specific type of culture. Each mention suggests a particular kind of haute indie taste, the kind that I obviously am more than partial to, I embrace it. References take up a larger and larger portion of our lives, allowing for people to sort of create their own universe where they can interact with others.                

                I’m not sure how many more trailers these guys are going to put out for Bebe. However many they are, they are worth it. She deserves it.