Omar De Col

                Omar De Col is some British poetry guy. When I look at his name, I think he could be a historical figure who was well known for collecting exotic insects. I don’t know why his name does this for me. Perhaps it’s the “De” which creates an unnecessary pause in my mind. Also, I want to call him Omar De LOL for when he does something funny.

                Most of what he does is genuinely funny. Even his Tumblr shows off his mix of honesty and humor. It gives off a feeling of sweetness and confidence in short concise sentences or phrases. Plus the name of it “Avant-Garde Bagpipe Solos” goes well with my fictitious genre “Polka Noise”. The explanation of his work is 

                “this a collection of thoughts/stories/poems inspired mostly by red bull, residual (post/pre-masturbation) horniness and boredom” 

                Most of Tumblr should have this as a warning. At least Omar had the good sense of stating the obvious. It’s this humor which makes his limited amount of work so enjoyable. Most of his poetry appears either on his Tumblr or on LetPeoplePoems, a sweet site which allows people to submit their poetry. His poem about a deaf pigeon was the first submission.

                “Re Frank Hinton” was based off of his internet affection for Frank Hinton. For those of you unaware of her work, Frank Hinton runs Metazen. I like her poetry. She lives in a cloud of smoke in a part of Canada which other Canadians consider really boring. Internet crushes are hard he tells us. Having a crush on an internet enigma like Frank Hinton is even harder. As an added addition, he had this one go viral on Steve Roggenbuck’s Facebook wall. While it went viral, various individuals mentioned new poetic ways of using social media. I told someone to get a Cherry Coke.

                Two of his other poems are even more absurd. “Right before I come” mentions 60s movies stars and why he can’t bring M&Ms to work. His Omar.com one on LetPeoplePoems is fantastic. Instead of it being pure text, he uses a screen-shot of his poem, similar to how Frank Hinton used in “unrequested livejasmin.com pop-up”. Unlike that one, he openly wanted to use the Omar.com site to branch out to every part of the Omar demographic. Plus, he’ll monetize it hard and bring about joy through social networking.

                Another one of his poems “so hawny” expresses his joy at being aroused sexually. Food items become objects of affection. The mention of marmalade helps me remember just how British he is because we don’t believe in that shit here in America. In America we fuck pies. By the end we get to the age old question of whether or not life is better having fucked a jar of peanut butter or simply leaving it alone. Personally, I feel it is better to have loved and lost than to not have loved at all. He expresses similar feelings in the poem "long distance relationships" where sex is had over Skype. Omar is a dreamer.

                I’ve only been exposed to a little more than this from his Tumblr. Most of his Tumblr is made up of ridiculous images with even more ridiculous captions. Out of all of them, I enjoyed the Buddha statue the most. Omar is just beginning, but I want him to continue. Continue with this train of thought Omar De Col, I want to continue using your sweet name. Holy crap he’s also on twitter as “Holiecrap”. 

                PS: Let me know if you prefer to be called Omar De LOL