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| The power of cute compels you! |
Marisol Valles Garcia is beginning a new wave of stop crime. You may be familiar with the “broken windows” theory of fighting crime. This theory stated that if you catch people for smaller crimes, you’ll end that feeling of helplessness that engulfs the area. Due in part to this and various economic factors New York City saw the crime rate drop.
Ms. Garcia’s new wave is the wave of cuteness. An adorable 20 year old college student has decided to take on the unstoppable crime wave with purely her cute skills. Perhaps she’ll transform herself into a kind of Pokémon, using her powers to defeat the most hardened of criminals Mexico’s drug cartels have to offer in Praxedis G. Guerrero.
Initially these evil fiends might try to take advantage of this criminology student. Of course, they won’t realize her true powers until it is too late.
As they rough up various citizens of her town, she’s suddenly jump up into the air, loudly screaming “Pika” and they won’t know what will happen next. Earth’s energy will be tapped as she releases that final “Chu” and lighting flies out of her hands, terrifying the evil doers. Terrified, the evil doers will stop their villainous ways and start publishing tumblrs showing the beauty of nature.
There’s precedent for this of course. Post-War Japan has enjoyed one of the lowest crime rates out of any other country in the world. Some attribute this to a relatively prosperous and equal distribution of wealth. But this doesn’t hold up against closer investigation.
Upon its defeat following World War II, Japan became a pacifist nation. In those terms of surrender, that was one of the main agreements. Another, smaller agreement had to be that all advertisements had to include at least 50% cartoon characters or cartoon-like humans. This has gone unnoticed, and initially the population was like “WTF is this? Why are cartoon characters selling me feminine hygiene products” but now it has become an integral part of their life. Psychologists in the United States explored this topic extensively during World War II via the Warner Brother’s propaganda cartoons and realized this is what galvanized our forces against the enemy. So it got tried in Japan as a first trial for the experiment.
Cartoon characters and cuteness in general can have the same effect in Mexico against the drug cartels. Those who run drug cartels are often thought to be heartless bastards due to their penchant for dissolving dead bodies in vats of acid. But even they will be unable to resist cartoon characters with eyes that shine like a blue million miles.
I hope that Ms. Garcia is able to turn the tide and again make her fellow citizens feel safe enough to go outside again. Godspeed You! College Student.